Resourcefulness under fire is essential...
The ability to stay centered, while deeply connected to others and the world, is the difference that makes the difference.
When facing a defining moment, notice how you're responding, and the kind of attitude already in progress. It is possible to intentionally modify an attitude that's overdone or underdeveloped. Instead of just one response, you can quickly generate and examine several different attitudes; each with its own set of feelings, stories about you, the other, and the situation; plus a corresponding repertoire of resources.
This practice is about intentional movement between distinct somatic responses. Changing your state this way, generates and reinforces the neural connections essential for new moves in the future.
Changing your attitude "on purpose" also makes it possible to influence your own evolution—your self image, the stories you live by, and the range of responses available to you in any situation.